THE CRAZIES ARE BACK!!!!!

 DAY 22 DECEMBER F.L.Y. FINALLY LOVING YOURSELF CHALLENGE

Okay so i have been juicing up a storm and loving it...and then the dreams began...of lasagna, gooey pizza, cream of chipped beef, and all sorts of tom foolery. My objective was to make it to the 60 day reboot, in 10 day increments, one day at a time.

But then the crazies returned, i was consumed with the thought of F O O D! I was willing myself to go on while curled in a corner rocking back in forth chanting a Buddhist prayer and calling on the God in an ancient language...the crazies were back.

Something from the movie FAT SICK AND NEARLY DEAD rang in my ears as i was beginning to be hard on myself for not reaching my "goal" and this is the gist of it: any amount of juicing you do is a SUCCESS you can't negate the hard work and discipline it takes to accomplish 10 days of juice fasting and pour it down the drain because you didn't make it to 60? ONE DAY was better than the one you hadn't completed before you started...CRAZIES i tell you! And in my case it was 16...the next time it will be 21 or maybe 5? Who knows, but isn't some better than none? 

So here's what happen: I was working and one of my sweethearts asked what was i doing because i wasn't participating in the chat that was taking place, they were all just rambling on and i was in a daze, and if i am anything i am verbal...i told her to lay off because i was rocking in the corner trying to overcome the jerk chicken smells that were emanating from the evil laboratory below and as i was typing those words to her it hit me like a ton of bricks...IF YOU WANT TO EAT...EAT!!!!! No one said i had to put on a ski mask and go stick up a local pizza hut because i have put this self-imposed rule in my head!!!! I made the rule...so i can break it!!

And oh did i break it, once i decided that i was going to eat, i wanted to wait until the day before my wedding anniversary, then i thought why? If you want to eat, eat now, so i had brown rice, an apple and savory veggie soup and a piece of loverly jerk chicken. It was a modest and nutritious meal and i was proud that i didn't head out to the dope man (7-11) and re-up on that stuff (cheetos, chocolate bar, soda) I choose a decent meal and was happier for it.

My Second Meal was FRICKIN FANTASTIC OMG I went to this fabulous little place called THE GRIND HOUSE  I had a savory bean soup, Veggie Wrap that i could have slapped someones mama over and CHICK UN salad! D I V I N E. This was 100 percent Vegan and i loved every morsel.  I still juiced my Appletini that morning and then i had my dinner at the grind house and i was SET! 

Now my goal is to eventually be VEGAN but that dirty bird got a hold on me like nothing in the annuls of time, i believe it is something in my DNA i swear to you, but i know i can kick it, as i have before, but it will be gradual and with balance, or i may just wake up and say thats it dirty bird...take your feathers and hormones and go squawk some place else HA! What ever i decide to do it will be coming from a place of love and wanting what is best FOR ME!

I am so glad i decided to kick the crazies in the arse this time and give my body time to adjust before my 21st wedding anniversary...because it is adjusting and that wouldn't be a good look come December 27th Tehehehehehehehee :D

I can do this, this is so doable and most importantly...GOOD FOR ME and promotes SELF LOVE. I would never do to someone else the things i have done to myself, they would no longer be my friend and would want to have nothing to do with me, and i wouldn't blame them.  SO every day is a conscious decision to do better by myself because I AM WORTH IT! I will have my lasagna, and my gooey pizza but it will be vegan and with the cheese that wont have me in the ER with an asthma attack or make my allergies behave so poorly i wanna scream bloody murder! NEIGH i am loving myself these days and that requires making good choices for my spiritual mental and physical health! 


Respect your body...your temple!
It's been better to you, than you've been to it.
Give thanks to your body for it's life long commitment and loyalty to you!"

This is a road of self-love self-discovery and self-mastery. I think we could all do better if we learned to control ourselves and set a course for our own destiny instead of offering so many opinions and advice we simply do not follow personally. BE THE CHANGE WE SEEK!

P.S. my heel is probably in relapse as i danced my pain away at my cousin's 40th B-Day Party last night...but dammit it was worth it!